For the last couple of days, KENTA and Ibushi have been feuding extensively over Twitter, creating anticipation for their upcoming G1 A Block Finals match and spinning an interesting tale of deception, roleplaying and hubris.
I have compiled my translations here, which were previously available as a (rather messy) Twitter thread, with updated wording and annotations. Questions and comments go here, please.
All tweets © their respective owners.  mark translator’s annotations.
It all started innocently enough, with KENTA reminiscing about beloved ex-shtick Bo-chan, but this drew the ire of self-proclaimed God Ibushi.
“Coming to this venue reminds me.
Of the day I started going out with Bo-chan. Do you hate soft men?
But you’re not there anymore.
I have to move on, too.”
“I said I have become God, not that I would become God. Not what everyone calls a god, but GOD. God.
Not yet. Faith and founder are [redacted].
Direct your prayers to God
Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen
0.4% is understood.
You’re God as well.
You can become God.
Pray pray pray!
[This is] the trap…
P L E A S E B E A D D I C T E D🙏”
[The “have become God” part was in reference to KENTA’s backstage comments from 10/13, where he said “In the entirety of the history of mankind, no one uses the word ‘God’ as carelessly as he does. You know what I’m talking about, right? Do you know what he said? He said ‘I will become God’. If a guy who’s pushing 40 says something like that, he’s lost his marbles.”]
[It must also be remarked for completion’s sake that the いわゆる神 (“so-called God”) part of this might be a vague reference to Kenny’s tweet from January, where he called Ibushi a “quote unquote God” as well (albeit using とやら instead of いわゆる)]
Devout believer Okamoto from Tokyo Sports immediately recognizes the ritualistic chanting as the same form of
brainwashing revelation he received from Ibushi years ago, in an interview from 2015 in KAMINOGE vol. 44
“Hm, seems like one time I got a lot of this via LINE…
O God! Grant me light!”
[Text in the screenshot from the interview]
Okamoto: So, these are LINE [text messages]. Take a look, please.
Interviewer: Uhm, “AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN [and so forth, you get the idea]” “Descend into hell!” “Death! Worship me!”. W-what is this!?
Okamoto: How’s this? It’s quite a lot, isn’t it? He sends LINE messages like this every evening to break people down mentally. Sometimes I wonder for what purpose he does it.
Interviewer: What is the purpose of this?
Ibushi: It’s brainwashing. Okamoto is already brainwashed [right now], so even if I say it, he won’t know. He can’t listen to anything right now, so I think he can’t hear us. This is what brainwashing is.
Ever the caring opponent, KENTA notices quickly that Ibushi has been replying at rather unusual times, and invents a new hashtag to help the poor God find some sleep.
“Everyone, calm down and look.
This is how a 30-year-old writes.
And what’s more, he wrote this at 4:40 in the morning. The guy is unhinged in a bad sense.
Please tweet [using] #IbushiGoToSleep. I’m worried. I ask for your help.
Do your worst.”
“Turns out, we’re all unhinged in a good way. #IbushiGoToSleep”
Ibushi taunts KENTA back, but forgets in his zeal to write KENTA’s finisher name the correct way.
You [are the one who] can’t sleep.
A 30-hour day would be just right.
So let’s pray.
Go to sleep!!
KENTA’s reply is simple:
Ibushi decides to play this game by KENTA’s rules, and quickly threatens him with divine punishment (that will kind of backfire later), but KENTA just remains worried for Ibushi’s health.
#IbushiSlept ! I am refreshed🙌
Let’s play make-believe. Let’s play [redacted]*. We did that often, didn’t we?
Who shall be the one to dish out divine punishment? Hehe.
*[My guess is the redacted part refers to 神ごっこ, so it would be something like “Let’s play gods” (in the same sense as playing house). Are you afraid to draw the ire of the gods, Ibuko?]
“This guy must have completely switched his day and night cycle around. I’m concerned.
He has to return to a normal rhythm.
I wish to ask you guys for help.
Ibushi remains dedicated to the vampire RP, trying to legitimize his claim of divinity by reminding KENTA of another god.
“Wow! It’s still so bright [outside]! Good morning!
Day and night reversed? No way.
In this case, let me get back to reversing the reversed day and night.
I’m on it.
Well, I slept really well so I’m going right back to bed!
[text in the screenshot]
Tanahashi: “Ibushi! Next, you’re the one who shall become God!” (he says and taps his fist against Ibushi’s chest)
Ibushi: “I will become God!” (he says and taps his fist against Tanahashi’s chest)
Tanahashi: “All right!”
Ibushi: “Leave it to me!”
KENTA is unimpressed by the presence of two gods, even though his taunting seems strangely self-harming, given he is one year older than Ibushi.
“Lmao WTF! You’re nuts as well, but Tanahashi is kind of nuts too.
This is how a guy over 40 and a guy approaching 40 talk. I’m scared.
This isn’t a conversation from this world.
The hashtag seems to work, and exasperation begins to settle in for KENTA as Tanahashi becomes involved.
“I woke up right now from a nap. [Feels like] somehow the world lines have crossed.”*
*[in a “parallel dimensions are crossing over” sense]
“Another unhinged guy to add to the pile😩”
KENTA continues playing the fussy parent, using hashtags such as #IbushiVisitYourHomeFromTimeToTime and #IbushiAreYouEatingProperly
But Ibushi has encountered a problem related to that last question…
I got punished by the heavens and my microwave oven broke.
When KENTA tries to go to bed, Ibushi fires back with a rather spicy nickname.
“You were supposed to be asleep already…Mom always prays💤 at 9 pm, but she doesn’t pick up the phone.
New type [of scam call]!? “Hey it’s your mother” scam*!?
So, you sleeping? Good night, Hideo Itami.
*[The scam call part, 母母詐欺 (“hey it’s your mother” scam), is a reference to 俺俺詐欺 (“hey it’s me” scam) wherein the caller will pretend to be a son or grandson or nephew or what have you, telling an (often) elderly person they are in a predicament and in need of money.]
*[Etsuko is the name of Ibushi’s real mother.]
Next, with Ibushi’s microwave out of order, KENTA has taken it upon himself to provide for his “son”, but Ibushi suspects ill will.
“G O O D M O R N I N G😴
Fried eggs again? Jeez, enough. I wanna eat something else from time to time
Hm? I’m kinda turning green😣What did you put in these! Now I’ll bring divine punishment down [on you!]🙏
Mama KEN is unfazed by the accusations and cleans Ibushi’s room, but seems to have accidentally messed with the gas line in the process.
“Uhm, the gas! The gas! Mom, have you tampered with someone else’s gas? The 111 is blinking and there’s only cold water!
Another divine punishment?
KENTA urges Ibushi to #ChooseAFriend, but Ibushi ignores that mostly and gives an update on his situation.
“Oh man, finally, finally [they] fixed it👊Tanahashi, how are you?
Please give me a sign…
I got punished and punished again, [but now it’s] good night💤
[There is dialogue in the video between Ibushi and the gas company guy, but I can’t make out much of it, aside from him apparently telling Ibushi how the error occured and that it’s fixed now]
KENTA teases Ibushi with the hashtag #IbushiYoureOnlyHalfListening.
The memes had to come sooner or later, and KENTA is happy to provide with a photoshop of him, Ibushi, Ishii and O-khan onto the poster of We’re the Millers. Here is the original poster for reference.
[Interestingly enough, the guy KENTA photoshopped Ibushi’s face on is called Kenny in the movie. I’m not sure Ibushi knows, but KENTA does for sure]
Meanwhile, Tanahashi has awoken from his slumber.
“I slept for 4 hours and only woke up now. My bad.”
So from what you’re trying to say
That part is true!!! For real”
KENTA scolds him.
I’m looking forward to [what] we [can do] today [as opposed to what they were capable of when the pictures in his tweet were taken].”
After this KENTA seems reluctant to continue, tweeting the hashtag #IbushiEveryoneIsGonnaBeBoredSoon, but Ibushi brings up Bo-chan, and that hits KENTA’s sore spot.
“Good morning! Are you bored!? Oh my
I get getting bored when you’re trying to joke around, but I’m just always fighting! Am I perhaps less than Bo [to you]? Do you love Bo? Bored? Bored…I really am less than Bo. But you’re not giving up, right?
Or err wait, were you trying…to be funny?
“All right, will you shut up about Bo-chan? That’s a problem between us [me and Bo-chan]. Don’t stick your nose in it.”
Ibushi doesn’t reply for a while, and that worries KENTA so much he calls out with the hashtag #IbushiSaySomething and this:
“I’m worried. This back and forth ends today already. Let’s call him together.
Ibushi’s reply comes eventually, but probably not the one KENTA expected.
“Going back 16 years ago, 10 months after my debut in 2005, I met KENTA for the first time after having watched him on TV at the time. Then, 2 years later in 2007 in Nippon Budokan, he took me on with all his might after I had grown. And in 2008, 2009, 2010.
A while after that KENTA left for America. I wondered if I would ever meet him again…But then in 2016 again- [the text cuts off here mid-word]
KENTA rises to the bait and replies with his own teasing, cut-off message.
“You should at least call me.
How nostalgic. I remember.
Do you remember what you said to me after the match at Nippon Budokan in 2007? I remember it well.
It was such a hot summer day. After the match, without even drying your sweat, you came racewalking up to me and said, “KENTA, I-” [the tweet cuts off here]
As the twitter feud comes to an end, KENTA and Ibushi give their final words hours before the G1 match.
“This is my final message.
Well then, see you guys around.
“Everyone, mom, thank you.
Well then, let’s meet at the venue”
“A Block finals
If I win I advance to the finals
If I lose that’s it
Even if there’s a draw, it’s over
But pro wrestling has no end, it continues on forever!
Let’s watch wrestling live [=in person] today too! You’ll find that it’s a different kind of fun than watching on TV.
Today in Yokohama Budokan!!”
“I’m not thinking about making today’s match a good match. No matter how, I’ll win. I don’t [need to] choose a way [by which I’ll win].”
Special thanks to @yamanaka_syubrt for corrections and additional information, and in general for being a cool human being.